• A Review Page For Those Movies You Watch At Home!

    Couch Potato Movie Reviews is, obviously, a blog that exclusively reviews movies. What makes this blog different is the fact that all of the films we are reviewing are all movies that are available on home movie rental companies such as Redbox, Netflix, Blockbuster, and your quickly disappearing neighborhood rental store. This blog is designed to take a more detailed look at those movies that either were sent straight to DVD, received a very limited release in the theaters, or were distributed through the art house or film festival circuit. We will also review those big Hollywood films, but only after they are available for home viewing.

    All the reviews are written by fans of the great art of film making rather than some newspaper reviewer or stuffy film student. We don’t know everything about film but we do know what we like, and we are more than happy to share our opinions with you. What you do with those opinions are totally up to you, although comments are welcome and encouraged.

    Each film review has a one to five star rating at the end of the critique. Here is what those star ratings mean for you couch potatoes:

    * * * * * : Five stars: go and buy this one, don’t just rent it!

    * * * * : Four stars: put this at the top of your rental list.

    * * * : Three stars: average, not bad just not great either.

    * * : Two stars: only rent if you have to see everything.

    * : One star: don’t waste your time with this.

The Last Resort

TITLE: The Last Resort

YEAR: 2008

GENRE: Horror

Original ideas may be hard to create for most people, so many film makers will admittedly borrow or steal more original concepts from other directors and try to make them their own. The problem lies when one swipes ideas from films that were uninspired in the first place. As an example we have the film The Last Resort, which uses many of the concepts from the sub-par thriller Turistas and adds a supernatural element similar to the more classic The Haunting Of Hill House. The end result for The Last Resort is a tepid horror thriller that is uninspired and just not worth watching.

Bride-to-be Kathleen (played by Marissa Tait) has her bachelorette party in Mexico with four of her closest friends. After a raucous night of drinking, one of the friends Sophia (America Olivo) meets a young American stud named Rob (Nick Ballard) for a one night stand. The other four find a couple tour guides to take them for a spin around the area, but in reality the men are robbers who leave the foursome in the desert without food, money, or cell phones but do leave Kathleen with a  bullet in the thigh. The stranded tourists discover an old resort which has been abandoned, and they decide to spend the night in order to bandage the bride-to-be and to find supplies for their journey. However, all is not as it seems and the four women start to act in strange and unexplainable ways. Sophia and Rob arrive to save the day, but discover that their lost friends are now possessed by the spirit of the resort which makes them live out forbidden pleasures.

Borrowing from poor material is bad enough, but director Brandon Nutt does not add any creativity to the production which makes The Last Resort an uninspired mess. The script is especially bad and does have some horrible one-liners throughout including “She’s shot. That’s not good” and “We should have gone to Vegas!”. Olivo is acceptable as an actress, but the rest of the thespians seem to be stepping through the lines and are not adding to the limited production. The production values are also limited: the cinematography is a bit dark in places, the lighting casts a lot of unnecessary shadows throughout the film, and the camera angles are not creative at all. The Last Resort seems to suffer from a cast and crew that merely went though the motions of a poor concept, and in the process made the film even worse. The overly bloody ending ten minutes is way too late to get the attention of most fans, and the grisly ending is too little, too late.

The Last Resort does not give the viewer anything that is scary, creative, or inspired. This film is a lukewarm effort to create a quality horror production, and The Last Resort is an epic fail in that regards. Olivo needs to stop taking roles such as this if she wants to be taken seriously as an actress as she is a talented woman who deserves better roles. The best part of The Last Resort is that it is only 74 minutes long and the viewer will not feel like they wasted too much time with this horrible production. The Last Resort is not a place one wants to go when trying to escape reality, and this film is a complete waste of time for the watcher.

*

–Mark

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